When I was younger, all the girls in school looked better then me, I thought. All the women in fashion magazines were all beautiful and skinny. I am wanted to emulate them. I thought that was what I was supposed to look like.
Why could I just look like someone else? Why could I not be someone else? Why can’t I just look like the people in magazines, on TV, in the movies? These questions flooded my mind constantly over and over.
I came from a home that didn’t have a lot of love in it. I was constantly told I was a fat pig, disgusting, unlovable, undesirable that I eventually believed it and repeated that in my head over and over. I tried everything to look and feel different. I was also in the closet for being gay and didn't have any stable, supporting outlets to turn to, being I live in a religious household.
I struggled with anorexia and a binge eating. I would shove multiple diet pills down my mouth. I would wear rubber bands on my wrists and would snap them every time I reached for food. I would eat and eat and then take laxatives to get it all out.
I also tried every diet pill, every diet fad there was. You name it, I tried it. Some would work and some wouldn’t. The fix was always temporary. The weight would come back and then some.
As a teenage I was a little heavier than most kids. And I didn't like it so I would starve myself and then I would binge eat. By the time I was in my twenties, I was almost 300 pounds. I was so afraid of myself, my potential, who I was, the body I was in, that I ate and created this barrier around me.
I struggled so much I did things to my body that were so hurtful and painful. I was constantly stressed. I struggled with anxiety, depression, I had so much angry and sadness in me, it was overwhelming, so I ate.
By the time I was 26, I was told by a doctor that if I didn't lose the weight I wouldn't live to see my son turn 5, he was 2 at the time. I had high cholesterol, high blood pressure and I was border-line diabetic. A friend had recommended I Weight Watchers and in 13 months I lost 105 pounds.
However I still continued to yo yo diet even after that. Some weight would come back on and some I would lose again.
I still maintained that mindset of not worthy, not good enough, not loving myself. And continued on the cycle of depression and anxiety.
Does any of the following sound familiar?
Wake up in the morning feeling rested. Ready to take on the world. Then you look in the mirror, and want to crawl back into bed. You don’t like the image that is projected back at you or you don’t know who that person is.
You are tired of comparing yourself to others.
You are always seeking out ways to be invisible or hide yourself cause you don’t like you or the way your body looks.
Do you constantly say to yourself….you aren’t good enough, not worthy enough? Not pretty, not skinny enough? I need to look like this or that to be happy.
You are so stressed out, it is now effect your immunity. And you are continuously getting sick.
Do you feel like no matter what you are never going to be happy with yourself and your body…..EVER?
I have GREAT news. It is time to change that….TODAY.
I have even better news.
The real issue is not your body and the way you think you look.
Its your thinking. Your mindset.
You have told yourself over and over again the same story. The one of not being good enough to the point that you are always stressed out about it.
In my program, I have 6 mindset shifts that are guaranteed to work. How do I know this? It worked for me and it WILL work for you.
Now I am not pretending to be an expert. I am going to share the stuff that has been helpful to me, in my life.
In my of my Love Your Body Road-map session, my commitment to you is, I am going to give you everything I can in the time we spend together. And in the end, if it resonates for you, I will tell you how you can get more of it.